Tag Archives: relationships

Why 2016 is shaping up to be the best year yet!

When one door closes…

Has anyone ever said to you, “everything happens for a reason”? Sometimes you want to immediately throat punch those people, well because at times that is the worst thing to hear, ever! I feel like my life has been “Reason” after another.  Sometimes the reason becomes crystal clear, granted it may not show itself for an unknown time, but when it does, you thank your lucky stars for that fork in the road.

Well it’s March 2016 and already this year been a twisting, winding road. I went from making a grand gesture to get something I thought was what I wanted, to realizing that everything I have ever wanted was right here in front of my nose the whole time.  Once I realized that everything I have ever truly wanted was in front of my face, I grabbed it with my hands and put it in a vice grip.

From Hot Chocolate runs, Valentines Day undie runs, to traveling to Arizona to run a Spartan Race, the adventures alone so far could fill a jar of lifetime worth of memories. Everyday I fall more and more for this woman and strangely enough, she feels the same way. Our wanderlusting has begun and the next chapter is just starting!

So, as I am preparing to embark on our next great adventure, Spring break in another country (okay so Puerto Rico is technically a US territory) I don’t think I have ever been this excited. I get to travel with someone who has totally captivated my heart and my spirit.

Why is this going to be the best year ever? Well, I have finally found someone who actually wants to be with me, shares just about every interest with me and actually wants to run with me, race with me, and adventure with me!

Stay tuned for our crazy adventures!

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Letter to my next Girlfriend

Dear Next Girlfriend,

Prelude:

It took me awhile to start writing this, but this post has been on my mind since I had my “Say Anything” moment back in January. I crashed and burned hard. In typical fashion after that happens I start analyzing everything and I do mean everything. From every conversation we have had and arguments to the fun times. I start evaluating what I did wrong and what could I have done better. This process is crazy because I am like a computer processor and I think about what was said in the way of why I am no longer needed or why this person just decided one day that they no longer wanted me in their life. So without further ado…

Dear Next Girlfriend,

I have a confession to make right off the bat, I wear my heart on my sleeve.  I know, this may seem crazy but it is true. If you capture my attention and my heart I won’t be afraid to tell you. More than likely though, it will not be some random moment, it will be some epic grand gesture when I tell you about my love. More than likely I will be head over heels for you and you will never know it. I tend to jump in with both feet and reckless abandon.

So that brings me to my first point.  I am a hopeless romantic in every sense of the word. Even though I detest that hallmark holiday they call valentines day, I typically love to go overboard just because I want to spoil my person. I will constantly be looking at you with a smirk on my face, I will tell you how beautiful I think you are, how amazing you are and how glad I am to have you around. This isn’t just a bunch of flub, but I am honest to God sincere.  I am also a very affectionate person, so I will kiss your neck, grab your butt as I walk by and hug a lot. I won’t apologize for this. So if all of that is too much then I am more than likely not your person.

When I get into a relationship I want to know everything about you. Some of the best relationships I have had the other person was the same way. I want to know all the things, from your favorite flower to your favorite book or poem. The more I know, the more I know how to spoil you, how to make you smile and show you how I feel without words. So when I inquire about your shoe size don’t freak out! In return I hope you want to know all about me, my past, my present and my future. Just know I am very guarded about some things in my life and I am not a perfect person. I have secrets, if you ever know about them, then you are one of a handful of people that actually do. Not everyone gets the privilege of knowing the deep dark parts of me. So if you get there, just know you have reached a place which few have and thus what I am trying to stress here is how important to me you must be.

When I let you in, embrace it, understand how special you are and know you have obviously broken down the walls, I have all the feels and you are important to me. With that being said, just know you will become my best friend, I will tell you everything, I will not be able to wait to talk to you to tell you about my day good or bad.  You will know about my business, my problems and I may ask for your advice on solutions. When I get down, depressed or just not feeling it and like a failure, I will hope you actually help me get out of my funk and not use it against me or as an excuse to break up with me. You may not know every detail in my head of why I chose to do certain things in certain ways, but know this, just about everything I do is very calculated and done with purpose. Hell I make lists for my lists, so if you think I am ignoring a problem or not facing it, just ask me.

One thing you need to know if you are going to be my girlfriend is that you need to have thick skin around me. I grew up being teased by my own family about just about everything. I am unfortunately the same way. I joke and have sarcasm like you would not believe. But please know this, if I am teasing you or picking on you…I FREAKING LIKE YOU! Don’t get all mad or pout, dish it back out to me! And for the love of God, don’t hold a grudge for something I said, if I genuinely hurt your feelings, then tell me, I am not an A-hole, I will apologize, because if you are worth it then a great relationship is much more important than who is right or wrong and pride.

Yes I am a sexual creature, I love sex, intimacy and kissing. I also send out a lot of sexual innuendos…pretty much anytime I can. So be prepared, if that turns you off, then I may not be the guy for you.

Speaking of joking and having a good time, you need to know that I am rarely serious. I joke around and live with a very carefree attitude. You might not find that attractive, but I love to travel, experience new things,

I am not into just hooking up, I want substance, I usually only date if I can see some kind of a future.  Granted there are probably exceptions to this rule, but for the most part, I am looking for long term and someone I can see a future with.

I also have a list of criteria that you must pass:

  1. you must love motorcycles
  2. you must love to travel on motorcycles
  3. not get mad when I want to run or workout
  4. know that I love running races, particularly OCR races
  5. must love to adventure
    1. hiking
    2. scuba diving
    3. downhill skiing
    4. dirt bikes or 4-wheeling
    5. rock climbing
    6. generally being active
  6. must want to have a family
    1. yes I want to be a dad, I understand most people I meet usually have children already, I still want my own, just know this.
    2. by saying all of that, I am not saying I need a biological child, I would love to adopt as well.

So by now you are probably thinking I am an odd duck or some anomaly, I can’t possibly be real right? Well I am a God Damn UNICORN! Yes I said it and let me explain further. Besides all of the above mentioned things, I also can do the following:

I clean, I can do laundry to include folding, I can iron clothes, I’m basically handy and above all…I love to cook! Boom I just blew your mind! I know you are asking, why is this even important? Well let me tell you why, because this will explain my need to fix things around the house, make the quality of living better, fold and do your laundry, wash dishes by hand and clean your place.  I’m a helper, I know you can do it, but sometimes if life gets hard, complicated and you fall behind, I am more than happy to help out. That is my nature, it is what I do. If this annoys or aggravates you, then I am sorry in advance.  I have a habit of finding or looking for things that need to be fixed and fixing them or finding ways to make your life just a little bit easier. So just let me or at least let me know if you don’t like my ideas and why, because I am ALWAYS right and I need a good convincing every once and a while.

So I am going to leave you with this little nugget. I am not from Texas originally, I lived in Michigan for 22-years but I have now lived in Texas for almost 23-years. I pretty much consider myself a Texan and more than that, I love living here. I love everything about this state, I am proud to live here and frankly, I don’t ever want to leave.  I got my parents to retire here and life is good.  With that being said, you need to know one thing, if you ever hear me say that I would actually move away from this state, just know that is a pretty serious statement. I mean, like for realz, don’t just take that lightly. You must be a pretty special person for me to say those words, many have tried and failed.

So do you have what it takes to be my next girlfriend? Well you know all about me and my odd quirks, so come on and say hello!

Loves and Crushes and the fear of both

“Love Harder”

In 2015 I made it a goal of mine to love harder. At the time I wasn’t sure what that meant. What does it mean to love harder? I think for me it was to put myself out there and not be afraid to get hurt. I see it often with these stronger willed, independent women who go through life alone and are so afraid to love because they were once “hurt” that they put up these walls and barriers and never really let themselves be happy. I decided I can’t live life that way. After getting divorced and realizing the person I thought was going to be my person, really wasn’t my person, I was crushed. It took some time but I got over it, I met some wonderful people, but I felt then like I was unable to fully give myself over. So when I did meet someone who sparked my interest, I thought why not, live life and love hard.

See I don’t care about getting hurt. I guess we really do all learn from our mistakes and gain valuable life lessons from them. Sometimes it is not very apparent but they are there. One of my favorite quotes from a song is “I’d rather learn what it feels like to burn, than to feel nothing at all.”

Love…oh love, it’s that tricky word we are all afraid to say to people for fear of what may come. Is it reciprocated? Rejection? Is the feeling mutual? These are all of the things that go through our minds. Well what do you think? Did I “love hard” in 2015? Well I can honestly say this. I’m in love with three people and I have a crush on three more. I know what you are thinking…that can’t possibly be right or I’m some kind of weirdo. Well I am a weird, but let me explain and no I am not one of those who found my soulmate every three months. Of those three, only one person heard the L-word from me last year. Yes it was a serious relationship with a lot of potential. Unfortunately it fell short of forever, like really, really short. One person I grew to love over time. The last never heard those words from me until it was too late to salvage the relationship.

A small fling that turned to friendship, with whom I remained close with, we talk about relationships and life and cheer each other on. Will that ever lead to anything? Who knows, but right now I love her like a best friend and it doesn’t hurt that she is a hottie too!

So the third person should have heard from me, she should have been told, but like a lot of how things go, I dropped the ball. I’ll take the blame, I boast of wearing my heart on my sleeve and this time I just didn’t let her know before she walked away.

Now you know a little bit about that, but I am sure you are sitting there saying…but tell us more, who are these women? Where are they now? What happened? Are you okay? (Okay so I doubt anyone really wonders if I am okay…ha ha, but it would be nice you jerks)

I bet you are wondering what one has to do to date me, well basically you have to hit me over the head because apparently I am blatantly oblivious when it comes to these things. Seriously, like send me smoke signals if you like me or I just keep moving along. I had to re-evaluate what I wanted in a partner after my divorce. I wanted someone who had all of the interests I do from, scuba diving, snow skiing, and riding motorcycles to running races, OCR and traveling the country or the world for that matter. Yes you have to be adventurous, have a sense of humor and have a thick skin, you see this maybe a character flaw of mine but I was raised in a family where poking, prodding and making fun of each other was par for the course at our family cookouts. Re-telling old stories of our adventures and never letting anyone live down what they did…well, that is how we rolled. I am the same way, so if you fall, crash or do something that I think if funny as hell, no matter how embarrassing, well…EVERYONE MUST KNOW! Some call it picking on, but yes I am very sarcastic and I joke a lot. I mean I joke a lot; I am not serious unless I need to be. Life is too short to have a constant resting bitch face. I want to look old because I have laugh lines from always having a smile on my face. So that is me in a nut shell, so yes I can be picky and this year I basically only gave you the time of day if you met my extensive list of criteria.

So with that being said, at the beginning of 2015 I found myself in a serious relationship, let’s call her Austin. I was told I was “the one” and then I wasn’t. This relationship lasted until around April, it was sad because I was in love and I also loved her daughter. Not being able to continue that relationship was hard, but I understand. I hold no hard feelings and honestly, if she ever asked to sit down and talk and maybe date again, I would be open to it. I doubt that will happen, but never say never right? Without going into too much detail, we basically had a different opinion on the future, moving in together, where to live and stuff like that. So the plug was pulled in order to pursue our life dreams and goals without compromise. So everything has a lesson right? Here is what I learned about this whirlwind romance:

Lesson 1

For as much as I preached about no regrets and living life to the fullest and taking chances, I was selfish on some of the break up sticking points. Mainly over moving, I was stubborn and wanted my way and I realized after the fact I had absolutely no compromise what so ever. I needed to work on that. I’ll admit I was wrong…

Okay well now you know about the one I told. But what about the others? Well on to number two.

Have you ever cared about someone and though that you could have a great time with them, but for some reason the stars were never aligned, but as time went on you developed feelings? It’s definitely an odd feeling because it isn’t that lustful type of feeling but it also isn’t like loving your sister. So to keep the innocent protected let’s call her Bombshell. So bombshell and I met in 2014 actually and briefly dated for a week or so and unfortunately, life was dictating (at least in my mind) that it wasn’t our time. We lived in different states, she has just quit her job and decided to go to school for a career change, taking a part time job to get by, financially everything was tight for her and she was pretty much committed to be there for about a year. Looking at the big picture, I was probably selfish and I self-ejected thinking that there is no way I could afford to fly out there that often. I kind of felt like a dick and I still feel bad to this day, but I have to say, we stayed friends believe it or not and have continued talking this whole time. We chatted during my relationship, my break ups, during her relationships, her break ups, life’s struggles and we still talk almost every day. So the bond I have with her now, I can honestly say I have a love for her. She is one of the few people I would do anything for and die trying to protect her (yes that is huge in my book if I am willing to take a bullet for you). Will we ever be anything more than pen pals? I am not sure; I am think that if it is meant to be then eventually everything will figure itself out. Until then, I am happy to have someone I can tell my thoughts to, give pep talks to and laugh with (or at sometimes!)

Lesson 2

                What I can take away from this is that again, I need to stop being so selfish.

So now we are down to lucky lady #3. My Sedona. The one I didn’t tell, the one I should have, the one that I let walk away for no other reason than because everything seemed like it was going to be hard. I just had a flash back to bombshell. Except the difference here is that we did do the cross country distance thing for close to 7 months. I know I am an ass, I will admit it. What was I thinking? Well in order to explain this, I need to start at the beginning, how it all started and how hard I have fought back the “feelz”.

Like many of my recent relationships, this one started over chatting and texting. This one actually if you want to get technical, started with “Happy Birthday” (in a Morgan Freeman voice) and a thank you led to small talk which led to 7 months of conversation. When I started talking and getting to know her, it was literally a laugh a minute with this one. One of the best things I think is that we actually went about a month before we ever laid eyes on each other. We didn’t just talk about sex and gibberish, we actually spoke about awesome stuff, and we played 20 questions, 5 at a time. Learning about someone first was a whole new twist on things. But did I think this was going to go anywhere? No, I didn’t…in my head right from the beginning I thought it would just be something fun. The distance thing initially had me worried and thinking everything I thought about the other relationships that started and stopped over the year. Plus I was just feeling the effects of starting to distance myself from one of my crushes. I met crush #3, spent about 5 days together and then everything was slowly fizzling itself out. While I wasn’t totally heartbroken and devastated, I was blue. Then Sedona entered the picture, soothed my soul, made me forget the sadness with long talks, advice on relationships and honestly…why she was better! Ha ha ha!

After a brief meeting in July, we went until September before we physically saw each other again. You know seeing someone basically two times in 3 months…I really had no expectations. At least that is what I kept telling myself. I tried to keep her at arm’s length, my mind tried to think of everything that would keep us apart. I think the most frustrating thing was that once I started getting the feels, I actually got angry that I couldn’t see her more. Being in Hawaii, talking when we could because of the time difference, wishing more than anything she was there to experience this with me, all the romance, sunsets, hiking and of course the race. Life was just throwing curveballs one after the other and I could never hit a damn curveball! Never! In high school they DH’d me because I could not hit the curve and they were tired of me striking out all the damn time.

Back to the story…by now you are wondering, so what does Sedona think of all of this? Come on I know you are, well she definitely had all the feels but we never talked about it. In fact, we never talked about the future, we never talked about what we were doing, and we never talked about being boyfriend/girlfriend. I always thought that was odd, but I didn’t push it because that meant I would have to talk about feelings. Then I slipped into a mini depression and I felt sorry for myself, I felt like a complete failure, everything I touch seems to fall apart at the seams. So of course I projected this outward and the effects of this rippled through the relationship.

On her last visit, one that was supposed to be totally awesome, ended up being a nightmare, ending up with her getting on a plane and walking away, basically ending everything. We had “the talk” as they say about the future and for me I just really wanted to know what we were doing, what was the plan, the long term goals. I was tired of not knowing when we would see each other, I wanted a plan. Part of the depression I experienced had a lot to do with finances and not having the funds to freely go when I wanted. I am a man damn it, I hunt and gather, I should be able to see my woman when I want to. Needless to say, in my opinion, I ended up telling her all of my wants and needs and she said nothing. She basically said she couldn’t give me what I wanted and thought it was best she didn’t waste any more of my time. We ended up talking for about an hour before she had to go to the airport. I quietly held her hand as we walked to the security gate, we said our goodbyes and I cried. Yes, I am not ashamed to admit it, most guys will, most guys are too macho, but then again I am definitely not most guys. (I’m a god damned unicorn remember!) Yes I cried over a girl, it was sad, I haven’t cried over any girls recently. Not when I broke up with Austin, no tears were shed there. So this is kind of a big deal to me.

After she left, as I do after every relationship, I over analyze everything and dissect it. Then it hit me, this was possibly the silliest breakup I have ever had. You have two people who are madly in love with each other, who never actually told the other person how they feel, decided to walk away because life threw a roadblock. But a roadblock which is actually easy to overcome. I started thinking about my list of demands…again back to lesson one and being stubborn. What was I thinking? Why am I not trying to be more flexible if in fact this is someone I am in love with? It did not compute in my head.

The more I thought about it, the more I knew I had made a huge mistake. I constantly preach about taking chances, not being afraid, just jump feet first into the deep end and guess what…I failed to do any of those things. I failed myself. I knew what I had to do, I had to change this, and I had to fix this.

Unfortunately this is easier said than done, I tried to reverse the damage, but she wasn’t having any of it. The more I dissected our last conversation, all I kept thinking was, I told her what I wanted, but she never said what she wanted. All she said was she couldn’t give me what I wanted and would rather walk away instead of proposing ideas on how to overcome these obstacles. I never did get a straight answer.

So the thinking had begun, I racked my brain and I came to one final conclusion and this is going to be the deciding factor moving forward in all my relationships, nothing really matters, money, living arrangements, moving to what city or state, in the end all that really matters when you love someone is that you are with that person. Sarcastically, I would be happy under a bridge, in a cardboard box if it meant I was with my partner in crime. So I went with that.

I bet you are reading this and wondering why I am putting all this out there for everyone to read, I know I should keep my private affairs private and not show the softer side, the vulnerable side of me, but I honestly do not care. It’s kind of therapeutic for me to write. I have hand written numerous love letters as therapy and never sent them, some of which I look back thinking how pathetic I was. Just when I think the world has ended, someone else walks in who is just a little bit better for me.

So how does this story end? Well with a grand romantic gesture of course! I couldn’t let this non-closure thing happen. It is easy to stop texting, calling, etc when you are 14 hours away. But I refused to believe what I was getting back on text messages. I wanted her to tell me to my face to move on, go away and never come back. (I know a little dramatic, but hey, that is how I roll) The hopeless romantic in me thinks it will end up like one of those movies; you know where you break up, spend time apart and realize you can’t live without the other person and you end up outside the window with a boombox over your head! In my case, I did something just as good.

I couldn’t take the distance, when you talk to someone every day for 7 months, not talking, hearing their voice and seeing their face, makes you do crazy shit. So I jumped in a plane, found out where she was going to be at this conference and SURPRISE! I felt as though worst case scenario, I needed closure for myself. No regrets, not even one single letter!

So what happened? Well, that is another story you will have to stay tuned for.

On one final note, I mentioned I had a few crushes, this is true. But I think it is healthy to have a crush or two. One I actually spent some time with in-between my romances, which is why it was hard to initially fall for Sedona, but she has a ton going on and trying to rein her in was almost impossible. So it is what it was and just another adventure to log in the books. The other two are just as tricky because crush #2 has no clue and lives at a great distance as well. If you noticed the order, then you have noticed that my crush #1 is mentioned last and that is because she is someone I met over a year ago, something about her caught my attention, but she was never interested. I think she is beautiful and it would be cool to get to know her, she actually lives in DFW. Right now I am in the friend zone, which is hilarious, but that is okay, I am a great person and a pretty good handyman!

Would I pursue them if this doesn’t work with Sedona? Possibly, you never know, but probably not since it would mean another long distance thing or putting myself out there and I am not sure my poor heart could take that. But then again, you never know, I might just jump.

 

One Final Lesson:

So what did I take away from all these relationships this year? I need to not focus on the future and what could happen as much as I need to focus on the present and making things happen. I still think breaking up because one person won’t move is one of the craziest experiences I have had, but again I need to stop being so selfish. I get I need to be selfish to a degree, I know what I want for my future, but honestly it doesn’t mean I can’t compromise or at least work on solutions before bailing. I cherish the experiences I had in 2015 and would not trade them for anything, heartache is just another experience which I am glad to work through because I have a ton of memories that were pretty awesome too.

My Name is Travis and I wear my heart on my sleeve!

Things I Think – Thursday 5/7/15

Boxing, Eating Healthy, ISIS in Texas, Just Being Okay, and This

So I had planned to not write anything about being in love or relationships or any of that stuff this week since I had been in both of the previous posts. But dang it, crap happens, people ask me for advice (why I have no idea, have you seen my track record?) and BAM! I have thoughts. So here goes this week…

Boxing

By now everyone knows what happened in the May-Pac fight last Saturday.  I for one can honestly say this was the first time since Mike Tyson fought that I have attended a house party to watch a boxing match. Too bad this fight should have happened years ago when they were both better fighters. But needless to say, we all crowded around the TV and watched for something EPIC. Well I can say I had not laughed that hard in a long time. The fight, well that was just ridiculous, it was boring and May2842614200000578-0-image-a-114_1430627226447weather just hugged and danced and occasionally threw a punch.  No, what I am talking about are the entrances by both people. Now that was some funny ass shit. First you have Pac, with Jimmy Kimmel looking all tough as his celebrity tough guy. Seriously he looked like one of the guys from Run DMC! But the all-time best was the selfie right before they entered the arena. The trainer, Pac and Kimmel…priceless.

Oh yeah and on the other side, Mayweather we all knew he had the Biebs in his corner, but when they first turn on the camera as he starts to come out, we don’t see that turd, no we see Burger King. The third funniest thing all night! Seriously, Burger King walked Mayweather to the ring…

So to me this says just one thing, in this age of social media and self promotion, we can’t even be serious in sports anymore because everyone is trying so hard to get noticed. In reality the “Selfie” was an advertisement by Samsung.  I thought Pac looked ridiculous and so did his one corner man who looked like a NASCAR driver with all of the logos covering his jacket and he has on compression sleeves (with advertisement) I mean really? Where is the fighter like Tyson was, you know, black shorts, no socks and a freaking towel for a robe, that he cut the center out of to wear like a poncho. Now that was a fighter. Yes boxing is dead, nobody cares anymore and I miss great fighters like Marvelous Marvin Hagler and Tommy “Hitman” Hearns. I think I would rather watch Rocky IX than anymore PPV boxing matches.

Eating Healthy

I have always had a very high metabolism. I usually eat anything I want and I have been okay with that. When I started this fitness journey about 5 years ago, it was simply because I was tired of my spare tire and I wanted to get active again. I spent basically 9-years doing nothing but sitting on the couch. So one of the first things I started to do was just eat better. I cut out the fried foods and soda as much as I could, but I still ate just about anything.

So I have been on cruise control through this journey until the end of last year. Then something amazing happened to me.  I met someone who for all intents and purposes, changed my life. It might sound silly but being around someone who eats healthy food seriously changed my eating habits and put me on the right path. I like to think I try new things, but in reality I don’t, I know I don’t eat seafood, in fact I don’t even try it.  I have preconceived notions of things either my family put in my head or I had a bad experience with. So I eat the same ole same ole.

I have a friend whose kids eat at the same three places every week. They eat the same foods every-time. My change started there, with trying to get them to eat more than chips and queso. I called it “Trying new things” and it worked some. Fast forward and I was asked to eat things like asparagus, artichokes and salads with kale and spinach. WTF? Can you be serious right now? I don’t that crap, don’t vegetarians eat that stuff? But you know it all goes back to the kids, they are like sponges and often times they repeat or like what you do. So once again the “trying new things” even if it was one bite came into effect.

But more than just trying new food, I am now in love with it. Sweet potatoes, umm yes please! Kale, I friggin’ love it! Artichokes, it gives me gas but hey I eat the crap out of it now and asparagus, I’ll eat it if cooked just right! But more than just the food, I am cooking it better by using coconut oil. I spent the first three months of this year eating stuff that I never would have eaten in the past. But it’s not only the food, I also cut out a lot of toxic things as well. Then in the past few months, I have met some uber heathly people, chefs who cook amazing healthy food and they have introduced me to more things. The kicker in all of this? I have embraced the “try new things” to a whole new level. I actually ate fish and calamari…and liked it! So thank you to all of you who have guided me to these new foods and way of life. Yes it is a way of life, not a diet.  Sure I have my cheat meals too, I mean come one I love pizza and cheeseburgers!

At the time of writing this I had an awesome call with a trainer and nutritionist who is going to further help with my nutrition and meal plan. I am super excited and I will have more details once we get my plan going. This is going to be awesome and hopefully will give me that boost I need. I have known this guy for years and we started talking over supplements, who actually has good products, who has good marketing and what I need for my performance. But before we do that, time to straighten the diet!

ISIS in Texas

All I can say is, hahahahahahaha! You really think you can come to Texas and try to strike fear into us? Seriously? In case you have not heard, two guys show up to a “draw Muhammad” cartoon contest in Garland, Texas in full body armor and start shooting. Well all it took was one police officer and a couple of shots and they were down. One 60 year old, 38 year veteran doing what he was trained to do. He neutralized the threat and nobody was seriously injured.  Now these ISIS folks claim more is to come and they have people everywhere…blah blah blah. I read today they plan on taking out all of the defenders of the Cross. Well, all I can say is that this is Texas and we have guns too, hell most of us have concealed permits and yes we can shoot also. The notion you want to destroy Texas is kinda funny actually, I mean we are almost our own country and even after all of our military bases and local law enforcement, you have all of us and yes we also have assault rifles and we probably can shoot them better that you can.  #Texasforever

Just okay

I think it is kind of ironic that I have friends that ask me for advice about relationships and life and things and stuff.  I don’t think of myself as Ann Landers by any means, I mean my own track record is nothing to write home about, but maybe it is because I am not afraid to put myself out there and I give 100% in everything I do. With that being said, I spoke with a couple different friends about the whole “life is too short” topic and spending time with people who matter. In the end we all came to the same conclusion.  If you are in a relationship because it is safe, easy, not complicated, and comfortable, but you are unhappy…what is the point? There seems to be two options, stay and make it work (because relationships are work and you need to talk shit out) or move on. Most of us don’t like the moving on piece because we have to change everything and we are all afraid of change.  Besides sometimes there is a reason you are with that person, it is not like we are in arranged marriages or relationships like 500 years ago.

My advice to my friends, was simple, you need to talk it out. Don’t let if fester and then you just explode, don’t live unhappy. I did it and it is no the way to go. Tell them you are unhappy and then make a plan to fix it. It doesn’t always work out, but in the end we need to be happy.  I truly believe in the “No Regrets” policy. I don’t want to regret that I shoulda, coulda, woulda, done something.

I can talk all day about this, but I came across this little saying and it spoke volumes to me and I hope it does to you as well.

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 This

I came across this the other day and I had to think and reflect on it a bit. Someday, somewhere…this…

I love you for everything baby … I want you to be and have positive thoughts … Everything will fall into place …It’s gonna be hard .. But smile be positive and think of me .. And us.

I love you because :
You’re strong.
You’re beautiful.

I love you because even on my worst days, when I just want to throw in life’s towel and give up on everything, you’re always there, still cheering me on.

I love you because even though you’re all of the way over there, and I’m all of the way over here, you’ll always be with me.

I love you because you know I love you.

I love you because even when I’ve failed to provide more recent reasons for my affection, you still know how much I care.

I love you because even if you deserve and could easily have better, you still choose and love me everyday.

I love you because even though the distance and time apart seems so much harder after each visit, my love for you grows more and more with each passing moment.

I love you because I’d give my life just to have one single breath of you.

I love you because you are more to me than you will ever understand. You’re everything.

I love you because I don’t want to be the center of anyone’s attention but yours.

I love you because I’m with you now; you can shut your eyes knowing I always will be.

I love you because you’re making my fantasies come true. I Just care about having them with you

I love you because my hand fits perfectly in yours.

I love you because we’re going to make all of our dreams come true together

I love you and I go out of my way to try and impress you.

I love you because your eyes are not only beautiful for aesthetic reasons, but when you look me in the eyes I feel like you know me better than anyone else.

I love you because you believe in me.

I love because you love me and we argue over who loves each other the most.

I love you because we can talk about our future together comfortably. Because we both know that not only can we last long enough to have a future together-BUT WE WILL.

~Anonymously Once Upon A Time… Do they live happily ever after? One could hope this day and age….

Music

I debated what to feature this week, old school, new releases or just my favorites.  So I threw in one of each!

Michael Jackson – Rock With You

Hootie and the Blowfish – Hold my Hand

Better than Ezra – Crazy Lucky

Things I Think – Thursday 4/30/15

Riots, Relationships, Workouts, Athlete Pages and Spartan Koolaid

I have gathered my thoughts for a week and here is what I think this week.

Riots

All I can say is that I am totally disgusted with the ignorant people who live in our country. Now that one city has done it, people everywhere are going to act like a bunch of heathens and burn cities to the ground.  This is absolutely the stupidest thing I have ever seen. I think everyone arrested or identified as stealing and looting needs to have their homes and cars confiscated and put in jail. How are they gonna feel losing everything. Sure the situation surrounding the riot is heartbreaking, but how about a little faith in our justice system and that the investigation into the death will be dealt with.  It makes me sick that we have these idiots ruining our country. Lastly, kudos to the police and the national  guard. That moron that got snatched up on CNN was epic. More of that is needed! I mean why is everyone crying foul? Curfew was 10pm, it was like 10:38pm and he was out on the street in violation of the law, I don’t care what he was saying whether it was peaceful or derogatory, it was past curfew and they arrested his ass. So…what is the problem?

Relationships

I have thought a lot lately about relationships, mostly because I recently have gone through some shit. No worries this isn’t a woe is me post and I am not crying. But I do have another revelation which has caused me to re-evaluate how I approach things moving forward.  You see this may come as a shocker to the people who know me best, but I am a stubborn son of a bitch.  Which isn’t always a bad thing, but it can lead to some serious headbutting. With that being said here is my new profound approach to how I am going to think moving forward. It all comes down to these simple three questions I need to ask myself.

  1. Do you love this person
  2. Do you love this person enough to want to spend an extremely long amount of time with them…IE married or just 40 years or so.
  3. Does the love you have for this person make you want to embed them into your life so much you see yourself having a family. Either a new created one or just make two parts one whole and then establish an existing one.

So let me break this down and explain more in detail. #1 seems pretty simple right? Well sometimes you can think you are in love and in actually you are in love with an idea. That was me last year.  You know you are in love, when you want to shout from the rooftops to tell the world. You are not embarrassed to be around them and you want all of your friends to meet that person. It also means you drive over 4 hours at the drop of the hat, because all you want to is see that person and when you get there, it is a surprise and you don’t say anything except this “I just wanted to to tell you that I am madly, deeply in love with you and I wanted to know and I couldn’t wait another minute” you know that whole “if tomorrow never comes” type of thing.

I know #2 and #3 may seem like the same thing, but they are not. I want a family, that is not a surprise to anyone who knows me. Of course I want to have my own children, sometimes life throws you curve balls, so in the end if I never have my own, but I come across someone who already does, I would be just as content being in their lives and making them better human beings.

Synopsis

So why am I on my soapbox? I am sure to most people this makes perfect sense and they already know this…well my friends this is my blog and it is what I am thinking! Seriously though, here is my revelation, outside of those three things, nothing else really matters.  It doesn’t matter if you live in a 3000 sq foot home or a 900 sq foot apartment,  big city living or life in the country. It doesn’t matter if you live in Texas, Colorado or take up a gypsy lifestyle and travel the world. None of that matters, because in the end all that matters is that you are with that person.  So from now on I am open to the possibilities of grand adventure, you want to buy a bus and travel the country…lets go, as long as we are together it’s all okay.

We all have our 3, 5, 10 year plans and honestly we all have goals and tasks we need to get ahead in life. I have a ton of goals in which I want to carry out both in my personal and professional life. But then again when this crazy world throws at you a curve ball, you know like telling you what you had planned is great and all, now go do it while trying to fit this love in your life.

So this leads me to my second thought,  compromise. Embedding another person into your daily life is difficult, you find that things start to change, your schedule gets off and you start to wonder “what the hell.” Happens a lot, mixing in is a struggle. But here is the deal, I learned a valuable lesson, I can’t always help people, I have to learn the balance between trying to make someone’s life easier and completely taking it over to do things my way.  So I need to compromise better, understand that things can be a certain way and its really okay.  We all have to make sacrifices sometimes and the hard part is determining what you can live without and what you can’t. Trust me, don’t wait until it is too late to figure this out. I often do this, I don’t see it until I reflect on things long after the fact.  Because in the end all that matters is that you are together and living a happy life.  This saying pretty much sums up everything I want, no relationship! I want a partner and partners work together to make it awesome.

Photo Apr 26, 23 16 51

Workouts

I am sure you can tell I have hit the workout thing a bit more aggressively than usual. I hate to post crap about me doing workouts and what not, because for the most part, everyone pretty much knows I workout to run the races. I am not a trainer, I am not a leader of a fitness movement, but recently I had another revelation (I know right like two of these suckers in a short time!) and I do like to humble-brag some on my accomplishments.

But first and foremost I need to apologize to some people and if they actually read this, you know who you are.  You see last summer I really became serious about getting better. Not because I wanted to win money or be this great “Elite” athlete, but because I am somewhat competitive (I know shocker) I wanted to just do better at races. Well you know what happened, the winter came and I went into hibernation mode. The time change and cold weather really demotivate me. But I did have this accountability partner who actually got me moving this winter. We only butted heads over gym workouts versus running. I am not a huge gym and weights guy, in fact I normally don’t do anything except run and the occasional push-ups and pull-ups.  So yes I was an ass, I was stubborn and I failed. I failed because I didn’t do anything the whole month of February. This caused so much discontent and animosity and I added on my “winter weight” and once march hit it was ugly. I started to run again in March because I knew I had at least 2-races.

So March was an eye opener for me, I had my first DNF. I didn’t posses the tools to complete the obstacles. This fueled my fire, I kinda went nuts.  I was already heating a healthier lifestyle thanks to my awesome nutritionist [yes she changed my life (now you know this too) and I’m eating things I had never eaten before] but now it was on overdrive. I was reading more on it, asking questions and getting advice. Plus I invested in more training tools, stuff I can take out on the trails with me and busting out the old P90X workouts.

Needless to say I came back stronger at my next event and beasted it. So now that you see me going to the gym (I still hate them) to get stretched out or doing these homemade workouts, it isn’t because I never wanted to do it in the past or that it was anyone in particular. I just switched gears and found out there are things I needed to change in order to get better. I learned that osmosis does not work.  So I sincerely apologize to everyone that I was an asshat to over the winter, you were right and I was wrong. But it took me failing to see that. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for inspiring me to get off my ass and actually put work in. Things like:

quote“You now know what you need to do, what to train on, go do it and come back stronger”

“Not Today”

“You know if you trained more you would be a beast”

At the end of the day also, I am still a better coach than I will ever be an athlete and inspiring others to be their best is a lot more rewarding. So come workout with me, push me harder, make me better and I guarantee I will do the same with you. I love making others better!

Athlete Pages

So this is going to piss off a bunch of people including really good friends I have…but WHY!!!!???? I mean I get that we are all athletes but no one is truly a professional. I mean unless you are not working a normal job and devoting your whole life to racing like my friend KK Stewart-Paul, then yes you can have an athlete page. But I mean some of the people I see with pages I just have to ask what the purpose is? What do you post there? I mean are you trying to inspire people or make a difference in their lives with something or is it just a vanity thing? It makes me think…hey look at me! I just don’t get the point, especially coming from someone who works in social media and has a pretty big grasp on the concept of what channels you use what for. I mean I could see if you wanted to stop the friend requests and keep your Facebook page a little more private to close friends and family, why then you would start pushing people to your athlete page to keep up with your OCR life. But no one is doing that. If you still are accepting friend requests from people all over the country, most of whom you have never met, then what is the point? I mean I am sure you women get 100’s of requests because your profile pic is usually in booty shorts and sports bras. What do you expect there? Of course everyone wants to be your friend, they want to creep your pictures. But I mean if you have 3000 friends and 2000 or so are OCR people, I don’t get it.

I think this would be like me starting a page Travis Blythe Dirtbike rider or Travis Blythe Snow Skier. Afterall those are my hobbies too, or wait I could also be Travis Blythe Scuda diver. I could even add the word “Elite” to it and damn I would sound like a total badass!

Note to you amateur facecrack people with Athlete pages, if you post on your personal page all of your workouts and accomplishments and pictures for everyone to see, then what are you doing on your athlete page? If you double post, then why on earth am I ever going to go over to your athlete page? It will always be the same content, come on people get with the program here, either learn how to use social media or stop with the athlete pages. Most of you are just weekend warriors anyway, stick to letting me live vicariously through our friendship and creeping through your feeds instead of random athlete page posts. And if you are tired of me posting my race pics or dirtbike pics or skiing pics or riding my Harley pics, well tough noogies, it is my page and this is my life and I will share with you as I seem fit and what I see fit. Unfriend  me or hide me from your feed if you must, but no I will not create an athlete page just to post my weekend hobby adventures on.

Spartan Koolaid

After the Las Vegas Super and having run Houston and Dallas Battlefrog, I have to say I have stopped drinking the Spartan Koolaid. In fact I poured that shit out. I am now on a steady diet of frog juice! Yes I know, I know I am still running like 6 more Spartan races this year, but I have to tell you the luster is gone. Last year was all about getting the “Trifecta” and even this year everyone was on the “how many can I get this year.” Well I am here to tell you that I could care less. If my schedule stays the same, I am on track to get one, yes one trifecta. I will have a bunch of supers and sprints but I only have one beast to date on the calendar.  Truthfully I do not care, the only way that changes is if I do something epic like go to Hawaii and try to do a trifecta weekend just to see if I can. (I know I can, it’s just wanting to actually do it) So Spartan out, Battlefrog in.

Music

Here is my weekly contribution to music that I like!

Ron Pope – If you were a stone

Boyce Ave – Speed Limit

Footnote

It is funny to me how music can mean such different things at different times in your life. Last summer when I was having some difficulty making a transition into a new life I remember hearing some music and how it made me feel. Then a mere 6 months later I hear the same song, the same words and the meaning is totally different.  Funny how the universe works that way. Tomorrow I could hear that song and it takes on new meaning again because life has changed again. Then on the flip side of all that, there is that one song, you totally bonded with someone over and how no matter where you are or what you are doing, that song makes you remember them. I mean they could have killed your cat or boiled rabbits on your stove, but all you remember was the epic good things like how your epic first kiss tasted or the most passionate love-making you had…or I could be wrong and you never forget the rabbits.

My name is Travis and I talk to strangers.

 

Social Media Rehab?

By: Travis E. Blythe

Is it possible, could there be such a thing? With all of the other type of rehabs becoming so popular these days, I.E. celebrity rehab, sex rehab (ala Tiger Woods) and video game rehab, is Social Media rehab far behind?  I know most of you missed that last statement because you are still thinking about video game rehab.  But that one is actually serious, in a story I heard on sports talk radio last week, a former pro football player Quinn Pitcock quit football with the Indianapolis Colts because he was depressed and was addicted to video games.  I think I won’t be going to work either because my PS3 is calling me 24/7!

Social media is all the rage now days, you may not even know or be aware that you are caught up in it but it started years ago with Myspace and now Facebook and Twitter have seized control of our lives.  Does anyone remember when the only thing on our phone was a phone? I may be dating myself here but does anyone remember having to wait to get home to check an answering machine? Well our phones have it all now a days and if it doesn’t, then there is an app for that.

With that being said, we seem to spend every living minute on our phones doing something, either checking email, sending texts, checking Facebook, sending tweets, watching videos, Etc.  When are we going to find time to actually enjoy real life?  They didn’t call it a “crackberry” for nothing you know.  Social Media rehab is coming to a town near you soon.  I am not sure what is sadder, that as adults we cannot put down the cell phone because we just have to play our “words with friends” or that we are actually putting these devices in the hands of 10-11 years old children.  Really what does a 10 year old need an iPhone for? Did you take away the PS3 and substitute it with a smart phone or are they utilizing them both at the same time?  If you try to tell me that a child at that age needs a phone to have for emergencies then you are ridiculous in my opinion.  We both know the child is going to be texting and playing games on that phone. Whatever happened to the pay phone that I had to use to call my dad to get me from practice?

Sorry, got a little off topic there for a second, but really those kids are going to need social media rehab by the time they are 18!  So tell me if this is your daily life.  You roll up to Best Buy and before you are out of the car you check in on Foursquare, send a tweet, and post to Facebook all at the same time.  Then some of you even go to Gowalla, Loopt, or Whrrl and do the same.  You leave the store and run over to Chipotle to grab a burrito bowl and you do the whole process over again.  This time you even add a comment on Yelp to tell the world about how yummy it is.  The whole time you are doing this, you are walking extremely slow and your significant other is yelling at you to “put that phone away” or “hurry up!”  I know you have all been there too.  Now we also have texting and driving, hell I bet some of you tweet, check Facebook, and email while you drive as well.  And here I thought the woman putting on makeup while driving was dangerous. I watched a couple the other night at dinner and they never spoke to each other.  They had to be around 21 or 22, and all they did was sit there, eat, drink and text.  How is that fun? I wondered if they were texting each other?

I can understand if it is your job to sit in front of your computer all day and work in social media, but for those of you who utilize hootsuite or tweetdeck, have all of your social media outlets loaded up and just monitor it all day commenting on everything, don’t you have a job? If your blocked at work from facebook, don’t you think there is a reason? No it is not so that you can just do it on your phone. Maybe they actually want you to be productive!

Yes it is soon going to be time for all of us to head off to Social Media rehab.  A place where they take away your phone, your iPad and your laptop.  They make you actually have to communicate to live real people and do an activity without the technology guiding you.  You have to actually play Foursquare with a real ball, read a real book or write an actual letter with a pencil and paper.  Oh my gosh, imagine that?

Yes I am guilty of all of the above; it is difficult but I am trying to put my phone down after 7pm at night and on the weekends.  I did stop tweeting on the weekends (mostly) but now it is September and fantasy football is beginning. So now I can watch football, text, tweet, FB, and play interactive fantasy football on Sundays, oh man that just sounded like I need help.

What a crazy world we are living in, all this technology to stay social and keep up constantly with what everyone is doing.  Yes rehab is just around the corner, even if it is just a holiday weekend!